Motherhood Takes a Village — and Sometimes a Credit Card
Caroline Frazier on buying her village and why you should too.
Motherhood may take a village, but Caroline Frazier says sometimes you have to buy one.
Caroline, a former NFL reporter turned full-time mom of three (ages 3, 2, and 6 months), knows a thing or two about starting over. She and her NFL-coach husband have moved three times in three-ish years, uprooting their lives every season and landing in new cities where they don’t know many (if any) people.
“The hardest part is never feeling fully settled,” she says. “Boxes get unpacked, things get organized, but it takes a long time for everything to really find its place. And when you know you might move again at the end of the season, you hesitate to invest too much in your home. But the most rewarding part has been realizing how resilient we are as a family. As cliché as it sounds, we’ve learned that home isn’t a zip code — it’s wherever we’re together.”
Caroline’s journey to motherhood and this nomadic lifestyle started on the sidelines — literally.
“I’ve gotten to hold two very different dream jobs in my life — what everyone would consider a ‘dream job’ as an NFL reporter, and what I consider the ultimate dream job: being a mom,” she says. “My job in football allowed me to meet my husband and understand the demands of his job. I wouldn’t be the wife and mom I am without that understanding.”
Now, she enjoys life inside the sport in a totally new way. “I loved my job as an NFL reporter, but I am now married to football. I actually enjoy my role within the sport so much more now.” That big-picture perspective is what drives her approach to “buying her village.”In a culture that glorifies doing it all, Caroline has opted out. “Our children were not meant to be raised without a village, and our homes weren’t meant to be maintained by just one person,” she says. “So, we prioritize our finances to hire the village. Nanny, babysitters, house cleaners, laundry service, and grocery delivery.”
It’s not about luxury, it’s about sanity.
“Outsourcing gives us our rhythm back faster every time we move. Our part-time nanny, in particular, is a godsend. She’s my partner when I’m solo-parenting during football season. I wouldn’t be sane without her. And outsourcing laundry? Don’t even get me started. Worth every penny.”
Through it all, she and her husband work to stay connected, even when football season means solo-parenting for months at a time. “We’re not in our ‘weekly date night’ season right now and we’re okay with that,” she says. “We find pockets of time, focus on quality over quantity, and sneak away just the two of us once a year. The rest of the time, we’re just in awe of the life we’re building together.”
Caroline is refreshingly honest about the chaos of this season of life. “Motherhood is a ‘both/and’ experience — both joyful and lonely, both fun and hard. It’s so many things all at once, and I wish we talked about all sides of it more openly.”
For new moms, her advice is simple:
“Motherhood is a journey of growth. Your capacity for love, forgiveness, patience, everything is growing. Growth requires change and change is hard! You’re doing an amazing job.”
Give yourself grace and, if you can, buy the village. You don’t have to do it all alone.
Follow Caroline’s Motherhood Journey on Instagram →